Wow! I wish I could help you. But, I would definitely be your problem child. I absolutely love to sing...as a part of the larger choir. I'm the first one to get the practice, and the last one to want to leave.
But, when the musician at my church starts looking around for leads, I start looking around too, because I'm thinking I'm not getting anywhere near that mic. I do understand that its about worshiping and not singing. But, at the end of the day, I want people running down to the front because they've felt God's pull on their lives, not because they want to beg me to stop singing. Part of it's confidence. I don't necessarily like to hear my own voice. It's shaky at first and I have to get warmed up. But, that's rather intimidating for someone of my experience level to do in front of a congregation of any size, forgiving or not. My husband (who went to school on a music scholarship and has an excellent voice) is very encouraging. I have sang with him and felt that was less intimidating. I'm sure people thought he was standing so close to me because we're so close in general (and we are), but really he knew I was planning to bolt at any moment and was physically blocking my path out of the choir stand. Besides being told I sounded like a chipmunk once, I've generally been complimented on my voice. So, I just don't know. I want to be braver. I'm just not. I've directed in my husband's absence from the choir...the back to the audience, works a bit better for me. But, not much. About the only gleam of hope I can offer is that...hey, I would like to do it. I just can't. I start to feel slightly ill just contemplating it. Currently, our musician or her husband have to lead many of the songs. It's unfair to them for us to be so dependent. I'd love to help...unless it involves the mic. I contemplated taking singing lessons. But, even that brings a high level of anxiety. So, I feel stuck. One ray of hope. I have been enjoying playing the piano. I came to the instrument later in life. It gives me something else to concentrate on, rather than my voice. I think I might be able to sing, while I play. But, first...let me go get some Pepto.
Good Luck and God Bless You.
PS. I teach at a university, I've taught Sunday school classes, bible class, vacation bible class...I do workshops of all kinds, and they doesn't phase me a bit. I enjoy it thoroughly. As long as I'm never asked to do it to music, I'm good.
