Man Laws

[elio]

hope mother jenkins an' 'em wasnt in there...

Oh, she was! I was at the lights next to the van from another church nearby and we both started revving, then on the green I hit the gas. Passengers weren't happy, I'm pleased to report. Should've seen those hats flying. 

Our van is an ex-police van, with modified engine - it does go if you push it.

[BigFoot_BigThumb]

Manlaw:  Stoplight Etiquette
1) If you are at a stoplight and the car next to you revs his engine, you must reciprocate.
2) If the car next to you continues to rev his engine, you must consider taking appropriate action when the light turns green UNLESS

• You have children in the car
• Your significant other is in the car (unless she's 'bout it 'bout it)
• You have reason to believe there might be police presence nearby
• The car next to you is a hoopty and the driver is revving the engine to keep it from shuttin' off

Manlaw?

I used to own a sports car until last year.  5.7 V-8, 305 hp/335 lb.ft/torque.  I did this on the regular.  If I was challenged, I had to represent.  If my woman was in the car, then she just had to ride it out with me,  She couldn't stand it when I did it.  I told her, "baby, I have to do it."  It's mandatory with a car like this.  So she was bout it, bout it by default.  Even her mother wanted to go head up with me with her car.  Unfortunately, that race never happened.   I sure do miss my car.  I'm gonna buy one like the car in my avatar, then I will win the street title.     

[rjthakid]

MAN LAW: Going for the Family Jewels

If and when you get into a physical altercation with another man (you should NOT be hittin on no woman.  ), you will NOT go for the family jewels. 

It's the punk move: "I can't beat you man to man, so I go below the belt."

Don't do it guys.  Don't do it.  (Unless somebody is trying to rob you.  Then all bets are off.)

[Nakia518]

A few more for ya:

• On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
• When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
• Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. EVER. Issue closed.
• If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:

(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

• The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

Fanny Pacc/Man Purse.  If you have anything to say on this one (other than 'NEVER!':

(a) Hold your hand out in front of your face, palm inward.
(b) Run into it repeatedly w/your face until unconsciousness ensues.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA......
ROFLMBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh God... My stomach is hurting... I caint Breathe......
 

[Nakia518]

MAN LAW: Going for the Family Jewels

If and when you get into a physical altercation with another man (you should NOT be hittin on no woman.  ), you will NOT go for the family jewels. 

It's the punk move: "I can't beat you man to man, so I go below the belt."

Don't do it guys.  Don't do it.  (Unless somebody is trying to rob you.  Then all bets are off.)

I agree... MAN LAW
Caution: The following comment has been edited by NAKIA

  ... and that's all imma say

[THE WOLFMAN]

MAN LAW: Going for the Family Jewels

If and when you get into a physical altercation with another man (you should NOT be hittin on no woman.  ), you will NOT go for the family jewels. 

It's the punk move: "I can't beat you man to man, so I go below the belt."

Don't do it guys.  Don't do it.  (Unless somebody is trying to rob you.  Then all bets are off.)

Man say what u wanna....if i gots beef wit her,

she gon' have catch a bad one..

[NJTheBishopAnderson]

Oh, she was! I was at the lights next to the van from another church nearby and we both started revving, then on the green I hit the gas. Passengers weren't happy, I'm pleased to report. Should've seen those hats flying. 

Our van is an ex-police van, with modified engine - it does go if you push it.

Okay, this practically has me passed out on the floor!!! RIVALRY CHURCH VANS RACING w/ PASSENGERS!!!! That takes the cake... I'm through!

[LyricTenor]

Oh, she was! I was at the lights next to the van from another church nearby and we both started revving, then on the green I hit the gas. Passengers weren't happy, I'm pleased to report. Should've seen those hats flying. 

Our van is an ex-police van, with modified engine - it does go if you push it.

Okay, this practically has me passed out on the floor!!! RIVALRY CHURCH VANS RACING w/ PASSENGERS!!!! That takes the cake... I'm through!

BEEF!!!!  It's not just for Rappers anymore.   

[HustleMan]

Let's Go.....

[malthumb]

MANLAW:  Barbershop Etiquette

1) When you go to the barbershop, get a haircut.  If it takes more than 45 minutes or involves chemicals, dye, or a blow dry, it ain't a haircut.

2) If two barbers are having a "political debate" and you must take sides, you WILL take the side of the barber who is cutting your hair.  The reasoning here should be obvious.

Peace,

James

[DBG2k5]

Men do not scream, especially in a high pitched voice. Note this isnt up for discussion, even if singing high pitched is your profession.

My profession is teaching parts to singers.  And I love my job.  Male or female, the part has to be heard distinctly & accurately.  If it IS your profession, then it should be a MANLAW because I  believe ALL manlaw books have a  'Protect the Money at any cost' rule.

[ReddGirl]

Let's Go.....

I can not stop laughing! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[LadyWiz]

MAN LAW: Going for the Family Jewels

If and when you get into a physical altercation with another man (you should NOT be hittin on no woman.  ), you will NOT go for the family jewels. 

It's the punk move: "I can't beat you man to man, so I go below the belt."

Don't do it guys.  Don't do it.  (Unless somebody is trying to rob you.  Then all bets are off.)

So my 15-year-old son don't listen to wisdom no how, let alone MAN LAWS......He comes up behind me trying to put a move on me to trip me up or put me in a postion where I can't move.  What does mama ALWAYS do?? GO FOR THE JEWELS  gets 'im errrytime! 

[sjonathan02]

So my 15-year-old son don't listen to wisdom no how, let alone MAN LAWS......He comes up behind me trying to put a move on me to trip me up or put me in a postion where I can't move.  What does mama ALWAYS do?? GO FOR THE JEWELS  gets 'im errrytime! 

Uh, you need to remember that he's a growing boy. You might mess him up for life doing that kind of stuff. See, ya'll don't know!! 

[LadyWiz]

Uh, you need to remember that he's a growing boy. You might mess him up for life doing that kind of stuff. See, ya'll don't know!! 

That means he has to get through his thick, Neandrathal skull that you don't mess with mama! 

[LadyWiz]

That means he has to get through his thick, Neandrathal skull that you don't mess with mama! 

Ok.....I don't grab hard, just enough to suggest to him that he may want to rethink what he's doing.   Now, when he sees my hand reaching back there, he backs off me! 

[LyricTenor]

Ok.....I don't grab hard, just enough to suggest to him that he may want to rethink what he's doing.   Now, when he sees my hand reaching back there, he backs off me! 

Just wrong!   

I will now refer to you as 'Lady WHY?!'    

[Keys410]

Just wrong!  

I will now refer to you as 'Lady WHY?!'    

More like "Lady Noooooooo"


Let us pray....lol

[HustleMan]

So my 15-year-old son don't listen to wisdom no how, let alone MAN LAWS......He comes up behind me trying to put a move on me to trip me up or put me in a postion where I can't move.  What does mama ALWAYS do?? GO FOR THE JEWELS  gets 'im errrytime!  

Unfortunately, as a woman, you're not bound by MAN LAWS.  The MMB has no jurisdiction over women.   

Still, if you ever want grandkids......

next time, go for the eyes or the throat.

Amen.

[Nakia518]

Unfortunately, as a woman, you're not bound by MAN LAWS.  The MMB has no jurisdiction over women.   

Still, if you ever want grandkids......

next time, go for the eyes or the throat.

Amen.

AMEN....

Lawd Geedus... She has scared him fo life..... Can we have a moment of silence for the Family Jewels...

....................................... ....................................... ....................................... .........................

Amen...