You can serve Jesus (and youth) without being a preacher or a pastor or having any sort of title at all. I think it's great to evaluate, and continue to evaluate, your motives. There was something that had a great impact on me, so much so that it literally changed my outlook even concerning my own title and "office" in ministry. It was the passage on p121 that discussed how the classism began to develop within Christianity, and how suddenly, everyone started hearing this "call" to ministry.
I'm not speaking directly to or about you, Churchy. This is so much bigger than you and I, or any of us. The truth is, we DO have a lot of folks who claim to be called to preach, and honestly, I'm not even sure what that means. And I don't think they're sure either.
I think that if we could dig deeply enough, a vast majority (vast) would be found to be pursuing a higher class and not just looking to serve Jesus. I think that in too many cases, it all comes down to personality characteristics, leadership qualities, character, abilities, skills, etc.
I know (now) why people always told me what I was called to do. I believe firmly that I was born to be an administrator. My wiring confirms that. I believe that there is a prophetic gift on my life. For varied reasons, people say I'm called to preach. For other reasons, people say I'm called to teach.
But I'm realizing NOW, that none of that is as spiritual or as deep as the church makes it out to be. The Bible says many are called (not ALL, but many). And only a FEW are chosen. So what exactly does it mean to be "called"?
Bottom line, I think most of us pursue the class above pursuing the call. If that weren't true, there'd be a lot more Christians doing what JWs and Muslims do, going out into the highways and hedges, standing on the street corners and going door to door. But we don't want to do that because there's no glory in that. We want the title, the pulpit, the spotlight, and a captive audience. God help us.