welcome T!!!How long have you been playing? It sounds like you may need to learn some theory;rudiments,etc.To play "by ear" doesn't mean 1 DVD= monster chops.Like everything else,you have to crawl before you walk-unless LORD drops a bomb on you.
If you WANT to play;this is a LIFE long learning process;no way to cut corners.The way to becoming a well rounded musician
is to become a well grounded one!
enjoy + relax