Do You Make Your Kids/Teens Go to Church??

[musallio]

When they move out or when they're 18, whichever comes first. When everyone lives together in the same house each person's spiritual state affects the whole family. It's imp that the family come together and pray and go to church.

It's like saying when you do you let your children stop going to school. WHEN THEY GRADUATE. You make them go to school and graduate for a reason. Chances are they'll be living with you for the rest of their lives if they don't graduate from high school. Chances are they'll be spiritually dependent on your for the rest of their lives if they haven't learned how to walk as a Christian and to depend on God. I think that people can be spiritually immature and underdeveloped. If they are they will always keep coming back to you to get you to pray for them (which is great) but they need to grow spiritually on their own and exercise their faith muscles. In my case, I had to get to a point where I realized that I couldn't rely on my parent's prayers.

That said, going to church and having a relationship are two different things but it's important that they see you going to church and your relationship and that it's real. If you've raised them up in the Lord I think once they get out into the world they'll see that they can't make it without that spiritual connection.

 

There U have it.

[Big T.]

GET BEAT THEN GO 2 CHURCH....yep, that's wat my mama told me a couple of time when i was little!

CO_SIGN!!!!

[sjonathan02]

Here's a questions for ya'll.

Do you let you child/children decide what ministry(ies) they are going to be apart of? (i.e. choir, usher board etc.)  Youth Bible Study is not an option, you're going!

Here's my take on it.  As a former youth choir supervisor, I saw that the ones who were "made" to be in the choir, where very distracting to the ones who "wanted" to be in the choir, and it made our job as the supervisor difficult. (one time this boy's mom dropped him off for rehearsal, HE WALKED IN WITH ME, then when I had gone to the restroom, checked the mailbox, turned on lights etc, about 6:15 (rehearsal starts at 6:00) I realized he wasn't there, so I went looking for him, and he was found by one of the other adults coming to the church walking up the street).

I think that you shouldn't make the child/children be in the choir or usher board or whatever if they don't want to because their attitude is going to show it and it will affect the minstry as a whole.  Now if they don't want to be in any, then you pick for them. 

I don't necessarily like children in any ministry unless they show a desire to be there.

[LaylaMonroe]

Here's a questions for ya'll.

Do you let you child/children decide what ministry(ies) they are going to be apart of? (i.e. choir, usher board etc.)  Youth Bible Study is not an option, you're going!

Here's my take on it.  As a former youth choir supervisor, I saw that the ones who were "made" to be in the choir, where very distracting to the ones who "wanted" to be in the choir, and it made our job as the supervisor difficult. (one time this boy's mom dropped him off for rehearsal, HE WALKED IN WITH ME, then when I had gone to the restroom, checked the mailbox, turned on lights etc, about 6:15 (rehearsal starts at 6:00) I realized he wasn't there, so I went looking for him, and he was found by one of the other adults coming to the church walking up the street).

I think that you shouldn't make the child/children be in the choir or usher board or whatever if they don't want to because their attitude is going to show it and it will affect the minstry as a whole.  Now if they don't want to be in any, then you pick for them. 

I learned that the hard way.  

The only thing my daughter ever wanted to do in church is work the videocamera, usher, and do children's ministry.  She has a huge heart for children, so that was a perfect fit for her.  When her attitude started changing from mommy's little angel, to mommy's teenage terror, I put her in this AWESOME community youth choir we have in Atlanta, hoping they would be a good influence on her.  She was absolutely miserable, and it showed every time they ministered.  My daughter would be up there looking like a fish out of water.  She couldn't get the clapping right, was uninterested in the choreography, stood still looking all expressionless... it was just a mess.  She wouldn't even fellowship during rehearsals and stuff.  And the teenagers tried to reach out to her, but she wasn't having it.

On the other hand, that same choir has a weekly Bible Study for the kids and a monthly service, and she loved going to the weekly Bible Talk and the monthly Friday Night Jam, but HATED the choir... hated it.

So, I guess to answer the question, no, I don't think it's cool to make kids serve in a ministry they don't want to be in.  They're not really serving with their hearts, as God expects.  They're not giving cheerfully, which is what He loves.

[under13]

When  I was 17, I started going to another church that had a better music ministry. I used to go once or twice a month for the early morning service, so I would still get to my church on time. I didnt even have a car, so I used to  bum rides or take a cab. I'm glad my parents didnt stop me from going, or else I'd be far behind with my organ playing, musical opportunities and networking with other musicians.

Now I've left my church (where I wasnt doing much of anything) about two months ago to play at another church. I moved out a year ago, but even if I was still living at home they still would have let me go. I havent, and dont plan on joining this other church

I think if churches would give the youth a reason to come, then they would. The only thing my church has for the youth, is a dance ministry. They started the youth choir again but all the youth already left or are at college (and they be singing some wack songs). I dont even think we have a 17-25 demographic at our church, which is a shame


As for making your kids join a ministry, I stopped being an alcolyte (alterboy) for like a month until one of the deacons made me join again. I probaly would have eventually joined again, as it was better than sitting in service doing nothing

When I have kids, I'll (most likely) let them go somewhere else When:
 they are 16
 After I've aproved the church
 They must come to thier home church no less than twice a month
 When They are 17/18 they can go full time. even if they are still living with me

[LaylaMonroe]

When I have kids, I'll (most likely) let them go somewhere else When:
 they are 16
 After I've aproved the church
They must come to thier home church no less than twice a month
 When They are 17/18 they can go full time. even if they are still living with me

What's the purpose of that?

[keptbyJesus]

What's the purpose of that?

I was thinking that but I just  .  lol

[under13]

What's the purpose of that?

Because I'm the parent and I said so!

I just think a 16 year old should still go to their home church at least sometimes. I dont plan on having to make this kinda decision within the 20 years

If they had a job as a musician or worship director then I'd be more leniant,

[3rd-Day]

They must come to thier home church no less than twice a month

*hand full of popcorn and butter stains on shirt*
I been wating all thread for a comment like this to come up!   

[sjonathan02]

Because I'm the parent and I said so!

I just think a 16 year old should still go to their home church at least sometimes. I dont plan on having to make this kinda decision within the 20 years

If they had a job as a musician or worship director then I'd be more leniant,

So, you have no solid basis, it's merely your opinion on the matter?

[sjonathan02]

*hand full of popcorn and butter stains on shirt*
I been wating all thread for a comment like this to come up!   

Visual. Is. Funny.

[under13]

So, you have no solid basis, it's merely your opinion on the matter?

What did you expect from under13?

And isnt that how most parents raise thier kids, on thier opinions and thier beliefs?

[sjonathan02]

What did you expect from under13?

And isnt that how most parents raise thier kids, on thier opinions and thier beliefs?

There are times when those opinions and beliefs have some sort of foundation.

[4hisglory]

So, you have no solid basis, it's merely your opinion on the matter?

My first question is "Are you a parent to begin with"? 

[T-Block]

I think that you shouldn't make the child/children be in the choir or usher board or whatever if they don't want to because their attitude is going to show it and it will affect the minstry as a whole.  Now if they don't want to be in any, then you pick for them. 

CO-SIGN, when me & my sister took over the choir at our church, that was the 1st thing we did.  We got rid of everybody who didn't want to be there.  Some parents got mad, but whatever.

I don't necessarily like children in any ministry unless they show a desire to be there.

Another CO-SIGN.  That also goes for grown folks as well.  I hate it when a man gets saved and comes to church how everybody want to make him a deacon the same way the want the women to be on the usher board.

There are times when those opinions and beliefs have some sort of foundation.

I'm guessing this ain't one of those times, LOL.

[under13]

There are times when those opinions and beliefs have some sort of foundation.

From thier experiences and how they were raised. No? So I was just speaking from my experiences , how I was raised, how it affected me, as well as speculating on how I might parent years from now

[LaylaMonroe]

Because I'm the parent and I said so!

I just think a 16 year old should still go to their home church at least sometimes. I dont plan on having to make this kinda decision within the 20 years

If they had a job as a musician or worship director then I'd be more leniant,

There are so many things that my parents did/said to me that I swore I'd never do/say to my child(ren).  Most of them, I ended up doing/saying anyway... but there's one I stuck to.  I swore I'd never answer my child's objections with "because I said so,"  and to this day, I've never said that to my daughter.

With that said, I hope as you mature, Under13, (and I hope that maturation takes place long before you reproduce), you'll come up with a better answer for your rules.  

[sjonathan02]

My first question is "Are you a parent to begin with"? 

Well, he did mention something about his parenting style in the future. Unless, you were talking about me. 

[Doubles22]

When they move out or when they're 18, whichever comes first. When everyone lives together in the same house each person's spiritual state affects the whole family. It's imp that the family come together and pray and go to church.

It's like saying when you do you let your children stop going to school. WHEN THEY GRADUATE. You make them go to school and graduate for a reason. Chances are they'll be living with you for the rest of their lives if they don't graduate from high school. Chances are they'll be spiritually dependent on your for the rest of their lives if they haven't learned how to walk as a Christian and to depend on God. I think that people can be spiritually immature and underdeveloped. If they are they will always keep coming back to you to get you to pray for them (which is great) but they need to grow spiritually on their own and exercise their faith muscles. In my case, I had to get to a point where I realized that I couldn't rely on my parent's prayers.

That said, going to church and having a relationship are two different things but it's important that they see you going to church and your relationship and that it's real. If you've raised them up in the Lord I think once they get out into the world they'll see that they can't make it without that spiritual connection.

 

*paints "AMEN" on a boxing glove and busts littlelamb right in da mouf*

[joshuag]

When they move out or when they're 18, whichever comes first. When everyone lives together in the same house each person's spiritual state affects the whole family. It's imp that the family come together and pray and go to church.

It's like saying when you do you let your children stop going to school. WHEN THEY GRADUATE. You make them go to school and graduate for a reason. Chances are they'll be living with you for the rest of their lives if they don't graduate from high school. Chances are they'll be spiritually dependent on your for the rest of their lives if they haven't learned how to walk as a Christian and to depend on God. I think that people can be spiritually immature and underdeveloped. If they are they will always keep coming back to you to get you to pray for them (which is great) but they need to grow spiritually on their own and exercise their faith muscles. In my case, I had to get to a point where I realized that I couldn't rely on my parent's prayers.

That said, going to church and having a relationship are two different things but it's important that they see you going to church and your relationship and that it's real. If you've raised them up in the Lord I think once they get out into the world they'll see that they can't make it without that spiritual connection.

 

The 18 is killing me, lol!!!  If you lived at my grandparents home you went to church until you moved out, period. So if you was 31 still living at home guess where you will be on Sunday morning...... hahahahah They really went there "as for me and my house" hahahahah.. The interesting part is only 2 of them came back home after moving out and only 1 tried the "I am grown" card but after my grandmother beat him down he had a change of heart. I think he forgot for a minute who he was talking to...

p.s- i think he still has flashbacks about that hahahah "old school"