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Author Topic: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married  (Read 7133 times)

Offline LEYLAH

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #40 on: February 07, 2008, 10:36:01 AM »
PORN sucks and its mad boring.. What is the point in watching PORN?   >:(
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Offline under13

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #41 on: February 07, 2008, 10:38:52 AM »
PORN sucks and its mad boring.. What is the point in watching PORN?   >:(
You might wanna put a "no pun intended" somewhere in there

Is it true that you have multiple screen names??

Offline SisterT

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #42 on: February 07, 2008, 10:40:42 AM »
PORN sucks and its mad boring.. What is the point in watching PORN?   >:(

What's the point in smoking weed?
What's the point in lying?
What's the point in robbing God of tithes and offering?
What's the point....I could go on and on.

It's satan's way of getting our glory. It's his method of keeping us in bondage. It's his way of getting us to exalted him above God.

We all have something we are dealing with that's not pleasing to God...IT ALL SUCKS!

Offline Dredakyst

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #43 on: February 07, 2008, 10:43:46 AM »
PORN sucks and its mad boring.. What is the point in watching PORN?   >:(

Due to the fact that it's a multi-billion dollar industry that exceeds all major sports (a form of entertainment) income combined...

so I'd beg to differ...LOL!   its not boring for many....in order to support that revenue

People watch porn to escape (most people call it lust), that is why most people harbor addictions for so long.  In their mental state of mind... reality is displaced... if only for a short period of time. (no pun intended) 



Offline LEYLAH

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #44 on: February 07, 2008, 10:44:24 AM »
You might wanna put a "no pun intended" somewhere in there

Is it true that you have multiple screen names??

Maybe or maybe not! Only God knows who I am!  ;)
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Offline nessalynn77

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #45 on: February 07, 2008, 10:44:57 AM »
What's the point in smoking weed?
What's the point in lying?
What's the point in robbing God of tithes and offering?
What's the point....I could go on and on.

It's satan's way of getting our glory. It's his method of keeping us in bondage. It's his way of getting us to exalted him above God.

We all have something we are dealing with that's not pleasing to God...IT ALL SUCKS!
You put the lid on that one, lol.  

I would add, that I don't think people watch porn for the acting or the plot... LOL.

Offline nessalynn77

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #46 on: February 07, 2008, 10:45:52 AM »
Whitney:  Crack is whack!  LOL!!

Offline LEYLAH

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #47 on: February 07, 2008, 10:47:13 AM »
Due to the fact that it's a multi-billion dollar industry that exceeds all major sports (a form of entertainment) income combined...

so I'd beg to differ...LOL!   its not boring for many....in order to support that revenue

People watch porn to escape (most people call it lust), that is why most people harbor addictions for so long.  In their mental state of mind... reality is displaced... if only for a short period of time. (no pun intended) 


Oh, so watching other ppl have intercourse is INTERESTING! I think not
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Offline pastors4jesus3

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #48 on: February 07, 2008, 10:47:35 AM »

I realize that some folks are repeat offenders--but even God forgives the repeat offenders. A person who truly repents with turn from their old ways. If they mess up, they turn around again, and keep making efforts to live a righteous life.

The problem comes in when our expectations are too high of the person, specifically marriage partner, is trying to change. When he/she messes up again, we are ready to bail out. Sometimes it's not totally his fault that he fails, sometimes we share in our spouse's failure. Why---because we never trusted them to do right from, we never trusted them to succeed, we never truly forgave them for their actions.

I really can't expect my husband to do the right thing, if I don't fully forgive him after he messes up. For instance, if he were to have an affair, I must forgive him, wipe the slate clean and move forward in our relationship. There must be restoration---placing the relationship back to where it was, actually even better.

When I say that I don't trust my husband because he did it before and I'm being cautious, then I am actually speaking a negative thing over my marriage. We are one flesh when we become married. Therefore, If I don't forgive him the way God intends for me to forgive, then I am an accomplist to his failure if he was to mess up again. The Bible says as a man think in his heart so he he----if I think my man is going to mess up again, then it probably will happen. I am guilty of thinking my husband would fail---so why should I be surprised when he does,

I counsel many marriages, and I see one in the relationship say "I knew he was going to do that again, he always does it." Well, that tells me that you didn't wipe the slate clean, and you expected the worse for yourself. Why be surprised that you got what you expected.
These are the words of a very seasoned woman in the Lord.
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Offline under13

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #49 on: February 07, 2008, 10:52:02 AM »
Oh, so watching other ppl have intercourse is INTERESTING! I think not

to each its own

Offline LEYLAH

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Offline w42879

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #51 on: February 07, 2008, 11:08:39 AM »

I realize that some folks are repeat offenders--but even God forgives the repeat offenders. A person who truly repents with turn from their old ways. If they mess up, they turn around again, and keep making efforts to live a righteous life.

The problem comes in when our expectations are too high of the person, specifically marriage partner, is trying to change. When he/she messes up again, we are ready to bail out. Sometimes it's not totally his fault that he fails, sometimes we share in our spouse's failure. Why---because we never trusted them to do right from, we never trusted them to succeed, we never truly forgave them for their actions.

I really can't expect my husband to do the right thing, if I don't fully forgive him after he messes up. For instance, if he were to have an affair, I must forgive him, wipe the slate clean and move forward in our relationship. There must be restoration---placing the relationship back to where it was, actually even better.

When I say that I don't trust my husband because he did it before and I'm being cautious, then I am actually speaking a negative thing over my marriage. We are one flesh when we become married. Therefore, If I don't forgive him the way God intends for me to forgive, then I am an accomplist to his failure if he was to mess up again. The Bible says as a man think in his heart so he he----if I think my man is going to mess up again, then it probably will happen. I am guilty of thinking my husband would fail---so why should I be surprised when he does,

I counsel many marriages, and I see one in the relationship say "I knew he was going to do that again, he always does it." Well, that tells me that you didn't wipe the slate clean, and you expected the worse for yourself. Why be surprised that you got what you expected.
I really admire your wisdom Sister T. We need things of this nature taught in our churches.



I must admit that at one time, I too was addicted to porn. It only took me a matter of seconds to watch porn but years and years and years to finally be delivered from it. Some of you may take it lightly as something that doesn't affect anything but the Bible specifically talks about the wages of sin. The Bible also speaks of something small can create HUGE problems in the long run. The devil must be exposed and called what he is. Sin is sin and there is NO EXCUSE for anything like that. I was freed from my addiction over 11 years ago and now I am much more capable of being the man of God and husband that I now am. I had to call it what it was and make a committment to change once and for all.

God will forgive but he will not allow a person to continue to abuse his grace and mercy. Galations says---Be not deceived, God is not mocked. There are consequences for sin. Most men tend to think that awww its ok, as long as I'm not actually doing anything. The word clearly says that if you look at a woman with the wrong intentions that you have already committed adultery. God is a discerner of the HEART. Outward talk and outward appearance does not impress God because he knows what's hidden inside. Sins such as this begins as a thought and eventually that thought will develop into diverse actions. Sin has to be dealt with at its earliest stages in order to avoid divorces, confusion, stife, resentment, adultery, etc.
God is good all the time and all the time God is good

Offline sjonathan02

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #52 on: February 07, 2008, 11:19:55 AM »
I think not

It is GLARINGLY obvious. :-\
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Offline chevonee

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #53 on: February 07, 2008, 11:24:59 AM »
I really admire your wisdom Sister T. We need things of this nature taught in our churches.



I must admit that at one time, I too was addicted to porn. It only took me a matter of seconds to watch porn but years and years and years to finally be delivered from it. Some of you may take it lightly as something that doesn't affect anything but the Bible specifically talks about the wages of sin. The Bible also speaks of something small can create HUGE problems in the long run. The devil must be exposed and called what he is. Sin is sin and there is NO EXCUSE for anything like that. I was freed from my addiction over 11 years ago and now I am much more capable of being the man of God and husband that I now am. I had to call it what it was and make a committment to change once and for all.

God will forgive but he will not allow a person to continue to abuse his grace and mercy. Galations says---Be not deceived, God is not mocked. There are consequences for sin. Most men tend to think that awww its ok, as long as I'm not actually doing anything. The word clearly says that if you look at a woman with the wrong intentions that you have already committed adultery. God is a discerner of the HEART. Outward talk and outward appearance does not impress God because he knows what's hidden inside. Sins such as this begins as a thought and eventually that thought will develop into diverse actions. Sin has to be dealt with at its earliest stages in order to avoid divorces, confusion, stife, resentment, adultery, etc.
You betta preach WJ!!! :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D :D ;D
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Offline gtrdave

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #54 on: February 07, 2008, 11:44:31 AM »
As a person who's been delivered from this type of thing I can say that one must be willing to catch it before it blows up in your face. I was preaching, shouting and teaching but behind closed doors, I was addicted to porn. It took me 10 years to build it, but only a matter of seconds to ruin it.

God is faithful and just to forgive us and cleans us of all unrighteousness but we must be willing to admit it and not make excuses for such an act. I don't care what is happening in our lives we have absolutely no right to indulge in such fleshly foolishness. Now that I have owned up to the problem, I have been free for more than 4 years it is still a struggle. I had to decide to avoid the very appearance of evil. It starts small and then it develops into something that you wouldn't imagine. The devil can sugar coat it and make it look enticing but after you get caught, he laughs at you and tell you how foolish you were for falling into the trap that he set.

It's not worth it

Pastor Robison

It's probably already been said but one of the reasons that porn has such a toe hold on brothers in the church is because we're afraid to talk about it.
We're afraid of the verbal and even silent condemnation. We're afraid that we'll be judged. We're afraid that no one else will understand what it's like to not have that instant and miraculous healing that others have had with their sin addiction.
That's why I fully support the guys who run XXX Church. Those brothers and sisters speak openly and unashamedly about the crisis that is porn addiction and they do it under the banner of Jesus' love and forgiveness, not forgetting that there is a penalty for sin, but offering the Gospel message as one of hope for the hopeless and freedom for the captive.

The Scripture that I cling to is Romans 8:1 "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus". I've shared that with folks I've been blessed to minister to in prison. Even though we all pay a price for what we've done, we can live totally free if we remain in Christ.
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Offline S_rey

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #55 on: February 07, 2008, 11:53:38 AM »
This is deep stuff here :o

Offline Furious Styles

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #56 on: February 07, 2008, 12:14:46 PM »
Our society has conditioned many of us to have irregular relationships with the opposite sex. Dave mentioned how we still are reluctant to talk about such things in our fellowships. Sadly men and women are ensnared in these types of double lives because we have failed to be transparent about certain choices and ptifalls that many of us have made. We all have been quick to be critical of someones shortcomings while we forget ours. I as a married man who loves Jesus has to be honest with my past transgressions of sexual sins. I didn't find that help among believers in worship but among people who are willing to be transparent outside of the "worship experience". WE gotta start keeping it real or more people will continue to fall prey to Satan's lies of enjoyment through sexual exploration.... That is what we are really dealing with...
Ignorance is Bliss

Offline Big T.

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #57 on: February 07, 2008, 12:23:19 PM »
Our society has conditioned many of us to have irregular relationships with the opposite sex. Dave mentioned how we still are reluctant to talk about such things in our fellowships. Sadly men and women are ensnared in these types of double lives because we have failed to be transparent about certain choices and ptifalls that many of us have made. We all have been quick to be critical of someones shortcomings while we forget ours. I as a married man who loves Jesus has to be honest with my past transgressions of sexual sins. I didn't find that help among believers in worship but among people who are willing to be transparent outside of the "worship experience". WE gotta start keeping it real or more people will continue to fall prey to Satan's lies of enjoyment through sexual exploration.... That is what we are really dealing with...
Speak my brotha'!! ;) ;D ;D
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Offline georgiagurl

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #58 on: February 07, 2008, 12:27:49 PM »
Our society has conditioned many of us to have irregular relationships with the opposite sex. Dave mentioned how we still are reluctant to talk about such things in our fellowships. Sadly men and women are ensnared in these types of double lives because we have failed to be transparent about certain choices and ptifalls that many of us have made. We all have been quick to be critical of someones shortcomings while we forget ours. I as a married man who loves Jesus has to be honest with my past transgressions of sexual sins. I didn't find that help among believers in worship but among people who are willing to be transparent outside of the "worship experience". WE gotta start keeping it real or more people will continue to fall prey to Satan's lies of enjoyment through sexual exploration.... That is what we are really dealing with...
I agree with this
Jesus is Lord!

Offline georgiagurl

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Re: A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married
« Reply #59 on: February 07, 2008, 12:32:57 PM »
I bleeve that pride do get in da way of da truth sometime. Folk be so self righteous that they can't see da writing on da wall. God try to warn us befoe descruction but it up to us to take heed to da warnings God try to give. I knowd I wuz heading down da wrong path wit my marriage I saw prollems develpng but I wuz too sorry to do somethin bout it. You cant be a lazy saint, do what u supposed to do and da right thang'll happen. Do what u aint supposed to do and pay da HIGH price. The devil make us thank dat we ain't gone git caught, dat we cah keep on creeping and git away wit it_but dat aint da case.
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