A controversial question- to those who are in a relationship or married

[chevonee]

Let me say first of all that this situation doesn't apply to me...THANK GOD!! I know that we may have had this discussion a while back but I'm not able to find it...so here's the question. If you found out that your girlfriend/boyfriend, husband/wife was looking at illicit pictures what would you do? If married would this be grounds for divorce...especially if this has happend before?

*I hope this doesn't offend anyone or get locked but there is someone that I need to help and I really don't know how to go about it*

[georgiagurl]

Let me say first of all that this situation doesn't apply to me...THANK GOD!! I know that we may have had this discussion a while back but I'm not able to find it...so here's the question. If you found out that your girlfriend/boyfriend, husband/wife was looking at illicit pictures what would you do? If married would this be grounds for divorce...especially if this has happend before?

*I hope this doesn't offend anyone or get locked but there is someone that I need to help and I really don't know how to go about it*

Do I know dis person? Cuz I think that you have to go to the word wit dis. The Word says that if you look at someone wit da wrong intent, you done already commit adultery. Do dat means divorce, I don't even know. I would be mad ifin it wuz me specially if I no I do my job as da wife, but divorce over dat iz somethin I can't say.

[B3Wannabe]

Pray for the spouse, but they need to talk about why the person is looking at pictures. Something may be missing. Many times, the spouse may want to be free with their loved one, but the other person has some reserves about things. If this isn't checked, after time, it can develop into desires for another person. There are scriptures that touch in these areas, and I'm sure someone will post them. For me, personally, as long as my wife doesn't want to bring another person into the room, I'm good with anything she can imagine.

[gtrdave]

I would see if they wanted help with the problem that they have.
If they do then proceed forward in that direction. A good Christian counselor can help greatly.
If they don't then I don't have any good advice other than prayer (which should be #1 regardless).

Understand this, though; sexual sin is one of the most difficult things to overcome (voice of experience, here) and it requires the sinner (let's all raise our hands, now) to constantly run to the Word of God for safety and for restoration. Just speaking that name above all names can be enough to deliver us from evil.

Realize that the world is very quick to want to stone the sexual sinner while Jesus was very quick to answer "go and sin no more". 

[funkStrat_97]

While the viewing of pornography is not good for your soul or your marriage, it is probably not grounds for divorce - at least not initally.  But it will need to be addressed and dealt with because it is highly detrimental to a marital relationship.  Sexual purity is not only for singles who must abastain from sexual relationships, but also to married people who have been blessed to have a husband or wife and experience the physical aspect of true love.  Here are some of the consequences of pornography:

*You open a door by which Satan can enter in and potentialy destroy your marriage.

*There is the possiblity of becoming dissatisfied with your spouse.

*It is a progressive sin that stars with the viewing of images and may lead you to seek experieces outside of you bed.

*It's damaging to your relationship with God.

*It robs you of experinceing true pleasure with your mate.

And there are many more, some of which can be quite severe.  In some cases, yes, it has lead to divorce.  The word of God is true: "the wages of sin is death..." and in this case, pornography has the very real potential of bringing death to your marriage. 

But prayer and perhaps even counseling would be the beginnings of the healing process.

[chevonee]

Pray for the spouse, but they need to talk about why the person is looking at pictures. Something may be missing. Many times, the spouse may want to be free with their loved one, but the other person has some reserves about things. If this isn't checked, after time, it can develop into desires for another person. There are scriptures that touch in these areas, and I'm sure someone will post them. For me, personally, as long as my wife doesn't want to bring another person into the room, I'm good with anything she can imagine.

That is the main concern. The guy wants to know should he stay in this relationship because this makes the second time that an incident such as this has happend...but they have 3 kids who are caught in the middle of this. I just wish I knew what to say to help.

Do I know dis person? Cuz I think that you have to go to the word wit dis. The Word says that if you look at someone wit da wrong intent, you done already commit adultery. Do dat means divorce, I don't even know. I would be mad ifin it wuz me specially if I no I do my job as da wife, but divorce over dat iz somethin I can't say.

Yeah Vet you know him...really well.. I wish I could help....he's such a sweet guy, who works hard to support his family...but this is what happend again. What do I say to help?

[georgiagurl]

I would see if they wanted help with the problem that they have.
If they do then proceed forward in that direction. A good Christian counselor can help greatly.
If they don't then I don't have any good advice other than prayer (which should be #1 regardless).

Understand this, though; sexual sin is one of the most difficult things to overcome (voice of experience, here) and it requires the sinner (let's all raise our hands, now) to constantly run to the Word of God for safety and for restoration. Just speaking that name above all names can be enough to deliver us from evil.

Realize that the world is very quick to want to stone the sexual sinner while Jesus was very quick to answer "go and sin no more". 

I like dis right here. Be blessed

[B3Wannabe]

That is the main concern. The guy wants to know should he stay in this relationship because this makes the second time that an incident such as this has happend...but they have 3 kids who are caught in the middle of this. I just wish I knew what to say to help.

Yeah Vet you know him...really well.. I wish I could help....he's such a sweet guy, who works hard to support his family...but this is what happend again. What do I say to help?

And see, you had everyone thinking it was the lady, since you didn't say it explicitly in the beginning!

I think men can handle this type of thing a little better than women, but that's me.

Maybe he's too sweet. Maybe he treats her so well, that she can't take it. I know it sounds crazy, but I believe that if a woman had a husband that was always nice then she'd freak out, turn inside out, or something. I'm not saying that this is the case here though.

[chevonee]

I would see if they wanted help with the problem that they have.
If they do then proceed forward in that direction. A good Christian counselor can help greatly.
If they don't then I don't have any good advice other than prayer (which should be #1 regardless).

Understand this, though; sexual sin is one of the most difficult things to overcome (voice of experience, here) and it requires the sinner (let's all raise our hands, now) to constantly run to the Word of God for safety and for restoration. Just speaking that name above all names can be enough to deliver us from evil.

Realize that the world is very quick to want to stone the sexual sinner while Jesus was very quick to answer "go and sin no more". 

God bless you gtrdave!! This is good all by itself....thank you so much.

While the viewing of pornography is not good for your soul or your marriage, it is probably not grounds for divorce - at least not initally.  But it will need to be addressed and dealt with because it is highly detrimental to a marital relationship.  Sexual purity is not only for singles who must abastain from sexual relationships, but also to married people who have been blessed to have a husband or wife and experience the physical aspect of true love.  Here are some of the consequences of pornography:

*You open a door by which Satan can enter in and potentialy destroy your marriage.

*There is the possiblity of becoming dissatisfied with your spouse.

*It is a progressive sin that stars with the viewing of images and may lead you to seek experieces outside of you bed.

*It's damaging to your relationship with God.

*It robs you of experinceing true pleasure with your mate.

And there are many more, some of which can be quite severe.  In some cases, yes, it has lead to divorce.  The word of God is true: "the wages of sin is death..." and in this case, pornography has the very real potential of bringing death to your marriage. 

But prayer and perhaps even counseling would be the beginnings of the healing process.

God bless you funkStrat!! This is some good stuff too!

[LEYLAH]

Let me say first of all that this situation doesn't apply to me...THANK GOD!! I know that we may have had this discussion a while back but I'm not able to find it...so here's the question. If you found out that your girlfriend/boyfriend, husband/wife was looking at illicit pictures what would you do? If married would this be grounds for divorce...especially if this has happend before?

*I hope this doesn't offend anyone or get locked but there is someone that I need to help and I really don't know how to go about it*

Well, this is a controversial question. I had a friend who did thoses things and his wife did divorce him. I think of it as this as long as the person isnt doing anything with other ppl then he/she or fine! They do need to seek help because it can lead to some problems.

[georgiagurl]

That is the main concern. The guy wants to know should he stay in this relationship because this makes the second time that an incident such as this has happend...but they have 3 kids who are caught in the middle of this. I just wish I knew what to say to help.

Yeah Vet you know him...really well.. I wish I could help....he's such a sweet guy, who works hard to support his family...but this is what happend again. What do I say to help?

Looka here cuz now you need to be careful that u don't git too upset bout dis. U can't do it all. I no u care and everything like dat but be careful dat u don't try too hard. Pray bout it n let God do it fah em.

[joshuag]

ok, i have to go here... great question it all depends. if my wife is looking at a fine woman and i see her, i may ask to see the pic too. ha-ha!! (just joking)

RULE number 3987740niud-9901 NO OTHER DUDES PHOTOS IN MY HOUSE!!! (unless it is family)

[jjblack]

A situation like this should always be approached with prayer. You must remember that this is just as much a spiritual battle as a natural one.

This is a much larger problem them most realize.


"In a poll of 1,000 respondents, 50 percent of Christian men and 20 percent of Christian women were found to be addicted to pornography."

http://www.christianpost.com/article/20070605/27799_Porn_Addiction_Flooding_Culture,_Church.htm


With the way that technology and the internet is growing, we need to be praying.

[chevonee]

Looka here cuz now you need to be careful that u don't git too upset bout dis. U can't do it all. I no u care and everything like dat but be careful dat u don't try too hard. Pray bout it n let God do it fah em.

Yes mam!

A situation like this should always be approached with prayer. You must remember that this is just as much a spiritual battle as a natural one.

This is a much larger problem them most realize.


"In a poll of 1,000 respondents, 50 percent of Christian men and 20 percent of Christian women were found to be addicted to pornography."

http://www.christianpost.com/article/20070605/27799_Porn_Addiction_Flooding_Culture,_Church.htm


With the way that technology and the internet is growing, we need to be praying.

It is a big time problem!!! The BOC has to quit sweeping things like this under the rug, its time to expose the devil for what and who he really is.

[sjonathan02]

Why is this "controversial"?

[nessalynn77]

ok, i have to go here... great question it all depends. if my wife is looking at a fine woman and i see her, i may ask to see the pic too. ha-ha!! (just joking)

[/size]

Thank you, you're dismissed.  LOL!

[chevonee]

Why is this "controversial"?

Because not many people want to talk about it...GRAMMAR WIZ!! BTW, when my grand babies comin...just kidding

[Big T.]

Yes mam!
It is a big time problem!!! The BOC has to quit sweeping things like this under the rug, its time to expose the devil for what and who he really is.

Amen to that. But one of the biggest reasons people don't approach this problem is due to embarassment. It is a very sensitive subject and no one wants to be the one who exposes their own use of these materials, even if it could help someone else be delivered. 

[georgiagurl]

Amen to that. But one of the biggest reasons people don't approach this problem is due to embarassment. It is a very sensitive subject and no one wants to be the one who exposes their own use of these materials, even if it could help someone else be delivered. 

I agree

[chevonee]

Amen to that. But one of the biggest reasons people don't approach this problem is due to embarassment. It is a very sensitive subject and no one wants to be the one who exposes their own use of these materials, even if it could help someone else be delivered. 

I agree

Co-sign!!